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Laugh for Today: Colin Berry’s Latest Idea

imageWe must begin with the title of Colin Berry’s latest posting: Corona discharge for Shroud of Turin – advance notice of my paper for presentation at the Quantum Theology 2012 Conference, Instituto Polytecnica of Mamma Mia, Italy

We then need to look at some of what he wrote. He really does have a sense of humor:

The starting point was the recent confirmation at CERN of the fleeting existence of theHiggs boson, aka the God particle, responsible for conferring mass.  We believe that in first century Palestine there was an anti-matter particle corresponding to the Higgs boson which we call the Son of God particle. The special location of Palestine in relation to tectonic plate boundaries and their associated magnetic field allowed the Son of God (SOG) particle to have a brief existence which we estimate to be  33+/-1.5 years. . . .

The stabilising environment could not survive for long following the death of the host, probably not more than 1.5+/- 0.75 days. There then occurred one God Almighty flash, aka Corona Discharge,  as God particles mutually annihilated Son-of-God particles to create a new transient entity that we call the Wholly Ghost-form of matter and energy. . . . All matter from within a putative burial shroud then disappeared, leaving just a faint scorch on the fabric. . . .

Did you spot the theological error? Perhaps Colin never read Acts.

We obviously intend to publish these ideas in a peer-reviewed journal – namely the local Hobbington Gazette that is perused by – among others – my good friend Lord xxxxx.  He, living locally, and not just a peer of the realm, but someone who borrows my grass strimmer from time to time, can always be relied upon to provide a fast peer-review service.

He then links to an abstract of an upcoming paper by Giulio Fanti and a few people, which I linked to yesterday, and signs off with:

Good try, chaps, but you never quite managed the quantum leap in thinking that led toMY Corona Discharge model.

Maybe you should stop drinking that Moretti beer and instead try the real ale down at my Hobbington local. After a pint or two you won’t just find yourselves on a different planet, as you are at present, but an entirely different GALAXY….

Enjoy. We trimmed Colin’s text a bit and added inline comments – fair use and all that – so you may want to read the whole thing by clicking above.

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